Thursday, January 13, 2011

I Dreamt A Dream

I totally forgot all about him after years and years since the day we stopped talking, calling, writing and even seeing each other until last week when i dreamt of him. I kept on thinking about him after that and could not help but beginning to miss him day by day until i finally found him on Facebook last week. He approved me as his friend.

He was my first love. I still remember that i used to adore him so much until i finally got the nerve to send him an Eidulfitri card during my form five. I must admit it was so silly of me but suprisingly, i did not wait long for him to reply. From there we started to become friends.

As one of popular guys at his school, i was getting the same reputation. People started to talk about us. For me, i just careless. What i know is i never really tell him how much i have adored and even loved him from the day i saw him for the first time at my school but i think he must have been totally understood it right from the start when we first met. He whom i knew was a very nice person, cared so much about me until he was willing to see me almost everytime i called and said to him i was in trouble. He cared and listened to my problems even after we completed our SPM in 1994 and started working. I can still recall that he came visiting when i was waitressing at a fast food restaurant. All my colleagues were praising him for his good look and said i was lucky to have him. To be honest, i did not really know what he was to me and i was to him but in my mind, he was simply the boy i have fallen for and out from nowhere, God sent him to me.

Our friendship did not last long though. I did not remember how we felt apart but i remembered that there was a girl he was in love with and she was his childhood sweetheart whom he could not forget. From there we grew our barriers. We finally stopped knowing each other when we were in our upper six. I decided to move on with my life and he with his.

Funny how i still keep the picture we took together when we were in our lower six and it is still in good condition. I saw it when i was picking up some old pictures from one of the drawers. There was also a picture of you, smiling. It was happening long before i even dream about you and finally found you here, online. Looking at it, i hardly recognize you but i am very much thankful to God for letting me to witness that you are now leading your life. Safe and sound. I even laughed at myself for being childish but i learnt something from it. Love yourself before you could love another being and it is all right to lose someone you loved for some unexplainable reasons because somehow God have been fair enough to you that He let that person to be with you for a duration of time before really losing him / her. At least he / she existed in your life before and once has made you happy. Therefore, be grateful about it. I am now sitting at my office desk with Coffee Beans Hazelnut Ice Blended on my right hand side. Smiling for letting go the past. Fly away, Love with all the memories we once shared. Alhamdulillah.

(Credit to Google)

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